Mistake

Last Wednesday I prepped the boys for the upcoming good-bye: papa was leaving for a new chemo treatment, starting with a week hospitalization.

They have their rituals, my men. Before leaving Kenji fills the bellies of their cuddle gnomes with kisses. During his absence, Big Brother and Little Brother still have a good night kiss of papa at hand. Both Kenji and the boys take this ritual very seriously. When I see Big Brother peacefully asleep, his arms clasping his lilac gnome, I know he's feeling surrounded with his father's love.

Last Wednesday Kenji's chemo treatment was postponed by a full week, since his blood values weren't sufficient. So this morning the whole ritual took place again: gnomes were kissed, papa was hugged, the cab was watched come round and we waved Kenji good-bye. The boys were brokenhearted.

At dinner the phone rang. A mistake was made: Kenji's blood still wasn't good enough for him to start chemo according to plan. Yet he had been admitted all day - luckily for prehydration and not for the actual chemo administration!
Kenji returned home, again. And Mrs. Errands takes up her correction fluid, again. Time to clear the calender once more and count down to another round of prepping my boys for sorrow.